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February 13, 2015

Commentary: In Defense of Changing My Mind

A few years ago, I wrote a commentary In Defense of My Relaxer.  At the time I was pretty adamant about not going natural.  
I feel differently now....I have a right to change my mind, don't I?  

Why did I change my mind?  

Here's what happened,  I moved to a neighboring state and I didn't want to find a new hair stylist and going to my current one would be too much of an inconvenience.   I was relaxing my hair every 10 weeks or so and coloring 2 weeks after.  So, I had to make a choice - spend time in traffic to get to the stylist to keep relaxing and coloring or take a chance and "go natural".  My hair was over processed anyway from doing both and I chose to keep coloring because I'm not ready to "go gray"....

July 17 2013 was my last relaxer, but I didn't immediately cut my hair.  During my transition, I had some bad hair days and some really bad hair days and almost threw in the towel on many occasions.  At the beginning of my transition it was easy to keep my new growth hair straight,  but around March 2014, everything changed.  I couldn't keep the relaxed hair curly (via twistouts, bantu knots) nor keep my new growth straight (via my trusty flatiron).  I spent the next 5 months very frustrated with my hair. 

September 6 2014, I had the relaxed ends cut off.  The next day I felt I could have held out longer as I was uncomfortable with my TWA and I have a section of hair that is straight, no curl at all...   Now 4 months later, I've made peace with my choice and I've had some better hair days but there's a long road ahead of me.

I've had mixed reactions about my hair choice.  Some people are very supportive, others have asked when am I going to give this up and get a relaxer or start my own Jackson 5.  

I am pressing on this new path and we'll see where it leads.

Until next time...Make today amazing! 

Below are some pics of my transition and when I cut my hair.

last relaxer-July 17 2013

keratin treatment by @mikaenglish (instagram)

rod set-September 2013

6 months post relaxer-January 2014

10 months post relaxer-May 2014-still keeping it straight

1 year post relaxer-July 2014

Couldn't take it anymore! Got some twists! August 2014

big chop- day 1-September 2014

It's growing... October 2014

November 2014

The puff-January 2015


  1. Hi Miko, it's Tia!
    As you have found out, "growing natural" is a process...but once you get the hang of:
    *finding the right products or making your own
    *figuring out the best hair style that fits your face and personality will love it!
    If you didn't already know YouTube, pinterest, and instragram has the best styles and tutorials!

    Brandy sent me a copy of your blog and I was just reading down and when I got to the end I was SO happy to see that it was you!!

    I've been natural for 3 years now. I never did the big chop I was too scared...I transitioned until I had about an inch left to cut off. It took about a year. But I was able to wear it up in a bun with marley hair and I rocked that style for 5 months. It was the easiest way to transition. Then I braided and twisted for another 4 months. Then I decided to straighten it. I wore it like that for 2 months and lost my curl pattern. I was so sad. So I braided back up and learned how to do my own marley twist. I believe that going natural now has become much easier...

    So hang in there boo...i support your decision, you look darling and if you ever wanna chat about it hit me up.

    P.s. tell the family I said hiyee and I miss them.


    1. You don't know how happy I am to hear from you!! Thanks for sharing your story and thank you Brandy for forwarding it!
      Email me your info